iAnxiety

Where is the Cloud? Who's got our stuff? Nobody works at the Cloud. --Laura

The Game of Life

They were getting married and divorced, and I was like, where are your morals? —Laura

You Can Take the Girl Out of Butler...

Your thang just danged. —Sommer

Charter Bus Challenges

Everyone knows you can't put your wife in the bay. —Mark

Entitled Buttmunchers

We spent $400 on ribs that night. We said fuck it, we'll sleep in the truck. —Snable

It's a Logistics Problem

I have two kids. I don't hang out at the Plaza at 3 a.m. That's why I don't see B. Dyer anymore. —Snable

Schizotarian

The voices in my head eat meat. —Laura

Tell Me Something I Don't Know

"She was like, I bet you can be lots of fun, and I was like, yeah I'm tons of fun." —Eric

Movie Trivia, Mike Todd Edition

"What's that one about the dolphin that keeps coming up?" —Mike

If You Want to Split Hairs

Verne: He tries to get to the 20, and he does.

Eric: He tried to get to the end zone. 

We'd Have Done It Right the First Time

Me: "Right after I cooked that Buffalo chicken casserole I found a better recipe."

Eric: "Oh no. If we didn't have regrets, what would we have?"

Well, Yeah

"So I didn't want to go in the well because I get claustrophobic, and Randy didn't want to go down because he had better shit to do." —Leigh

It Takes All Types

"Why doesn't he shower?"
"He's different. He's a forager."

Marriage

Eric: What's the most annoying thing I do?

Me: Trying to talk to me when I'm leaving the room. What's the most annoying thing I do?

Eric: Leaving the room when I'm talking to you. 

Honest Mother

"I'm sorry you're sick. But at least you're quiet." —Sommer